ParenthoodNJ.com

 
 
I took my daughter to a library program and the librarian started reading a lighthearted story about monsters under a kid's bed. My daughter pipes up and says, " There aren't any monsters under my bed. There is too much stuff under there."
 
 
To say my daughter lives and breathes everything princess would be an under-statement. So it is not unusual to see her dancing around in various fancy dresses pretending she's Ariel or Rapunzel or attending a ball or tea.

Today she was imagining that she was going to meet Prince Eric at the ball. Since Eric in the fairytale is a grown man, I joked that he was too old for her. She answered that it was another Prince Eric closer to her age and then added this statement to supposedly reassure me:

"Don't worry, we're just going to dance and fall in love a little."

Clearly, I need to have a talk with this Prince Eric's mother.
 
 
I love my kids dearly but there are some days I wish I had a nanny, a housekeeper, a chef and a masseuse, but I'll have to make do with Ben & Jerry's Mint Chocolate Cookie ice cream tonight.

Bedtime with my nearly 2-year-old son has been excruciating with him not wanting to be cooped up in a crib. Hmm. I wonder why he's suddenly opposed to be shut away from throwing toys all over my house in a bed with bars around it. And tonight, like the past several nights I closed the door and tried to ignore the angry screams.

With his screams still echoing down the hall I noticed the strong smell of nail polish. My 6-year-old daughter wanted her nails done and I said after her brother was in bed, which apparently meant the second his feet touched his mattress. Unfortunately, she didn't wait for me and ended up dropping nearly an entire bottle of hot pink nail polish all over the bathroom floor. And, of course, I don't have any nail polish remover. Or that nanny or housekeeper.

The one stroke of luck I have is that after using Soft Scrub with bleach and a scrub brush, the floor beings to look less like a crime scene and now I have one really clean spot on the floor. But I don't have much time to enjoy my victory over the garish nail polish as I finally take a look at my daughter who has streaks of nail polish all over her legs and hands (from the spill and her fevered attempt to clean it).
 
 
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My 6-year-old daughter has often said she wants to grow up to be a princess and we told her that she'd have to marry a prince. She sighed and said, "Where am I going to find a prince in this town?"

Since she started kindergarten last fall, she coincidentally changed her "career" and said she wanted to be a kindergarten teacher.

And just after ending school she came up with a new life plan. She said, "Mommy, I don't want to go to college." I told her that her father would be happy to hear he didn't have to pay for that but asked what she'd do instead.

She said, "I'm going to stay in kindergarten until I get married."

 
 
My daughter has been getting into art and particularly drawing "portraits" of family members. I got a cold, hard look at exactly how she sees me in my various moods. It's funny but should I also be examining just how my moods affect her?

And no, my hair is not purple in real life.
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This is my 5-year-old's rendition of me in a happy mood.

It's hard to tell but my eyes are green in this picture. She's very fond of giving women heart-shaped mouths.

All-in-all, not the worst portrait of me and certainly better than some photos I've seen of myself.

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This is my daughter's drawing of me in a sad mood. I think it's interesting how she changed the shape of my eyes to reflect the mood change (although I never realized my eyes turned pink when I was sad)

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This is the most amusing and potentially troubling portrait. This is apparently me when I'm mad.

I didn't think I bared my teeth like that - well maybe to my husband sometimes - but I guess I have to work on that with my kids.

At least I still have the cool purple hair.

 
 
My daughter and I were filling out this Hello Kitty scrapbook where you complete various sentences about your favorite things and there is one that says:"I never leave home without..."

I'm thinking the answer would be a doll or a toy and since she doesn't have one thing she always takes with her, I was prepared to skip it.

But then she says: "My underwear."

Yep, she's right. She never leaves home without it.
 
 
Having a preschooler can be tough, especially when they challenge you at every turn.

"I don't want to clean up my toys."

"Why does my younger brother (4 months old) get to go bed after me?"

Lately, I've taken to saying, "Just don't argue with me."

Tonight, when I said it, she answered, "I'm not arguing with you."

Then she laughed.

And then I laughed.



 
 
The other night my son was really fussy and crying for what seemed like forever and in exasperation I said, "Man, baby, what am I going to do with you?"

And daughter shrugs her shoulders and says, "Why don't you just sell him?"
 
 
My husband told our daughter the other that he went to the dentist that morning and she asks, "Did you get a toothbrush that lights up?"

He said no & she asks, "Why not?" as if there must be something wrong with his dentist.

Why don't we get light-up toothbrushes? Maybe we'd all visit the dentist more if we did :)
 
 
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Our 4-year-old daughter was showing us an art project she made at Preschool and we asked her what it was.

And she says, "It's an Eskimo."

We're baffled because it doesn't really look like a person (not even close), but ok, we play along.

Then she says, "You know those things at the mall."

Ok, now we're confused. "There aren't Eskimos at the mall," we say.

"Yes there are, those things that go up and down," she says, arms waving up and down.

"Oh, you mean ESCALATORS," we say.

"Yes! Yes! Eskimalators, whatever," she replies.

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