ParenthoodNJ.com

So my husband and 4-year-old daughter are out and she spots a PINK wedding dress in a store window display and starts freaking out. She actually starts crying because she wants it so badly.  My husband explains that it's a wedding dress and is made for an adult but when she grows up she can find the dress she wants.

Between sobs, she says, "I know that's the dress I want, I know it."

So then my husband tries explaining that we can't always get everything we want no matter how badly we may want it. "For example," he says. "I really want a Porsche and I'll probably never get one because they're too expensive."

"What's a Porsche?" she asks.

"A very expensive car and it costs a lot of money so I'll probably never own one."

Then our daughter says, "Well why don't you call your Mommy and ask her to buy one for you?"

(Grandma, if the phone rings, I wouldn't answer it).

For a little splurge, I gave my daughter a small ice cream cone and she asks, "How come there are no sprinkles like at Grandma's House?"
And I said, "I don't have any in the house, but you know, that'll be what makes going to Grandma's house more special."
And without hesitation, my daughter replies, "And that's what'll make our house more boring."

I'm lucky that my daughter has only had a fever over 101 twice in her nearly 4-year life. Last week was the second of those times. Over the weekend, she was feeling a lot better and the fever had finally broken and we were discussing how she was sick.
At one point, I said, "I was a little worried about you because you were sick and you never get sick."
And she said, "Then you should've sent me a card."
Ok, Miss Manners. I guess next time I'll have to.

My daughter is lucky to see my mom a fair amount but my husband's mother lives far away, making it difficult  to stay connected. It also makes it hard for me to make sure she knows she really has two grandmothers.

So I've tried really hard to be specific as to which Grandma she will be seeing or talking to, for example, my mom is Grandma K. Well, this was a tough concept for her to initially grasp so I said things like "Grandma K is the one we see all the time" and "Grandma K is the one who has the dog, Shadow."

After a pause, she asks, "Is Grandma K the one who always gives me ice cream?"

Apparently so.

And mom, you've been busted!

Danica: "I am a beautiful princess and Mommy is the queen!"
Daddy: "And what am I?"
Danica: "And Daddy is the prince!"
Daddy: "But I should be King, right?"
Danica shakes her head and says, "No, no. You're the prince."
Daddy won't give up. "But if I'm married to Mommy, then I'm the king."
I helpfully point out that just because he's married to Mommy, who is Queen, doesn't necessarily make him King. And I get shushed.
But I'm still the Queen and apparently he's just my consort.

Today my daughter is in one of her many dress-up outfits. She runs up to my husband and asks,"How do I look?"

He says, "You look gorgeous!"

And she says, "That's my favorite answer."

My daughter's name, Danica, is often shortened by me to "D" when I write, so I thought D-isms would be a great way to categorize her funny one-liners.

So here are some I've heard lately:
"Mommy, my shirt is dirty. You can just put it in the dishwasher to clean it."

"I feel much more better."

"I look fablious"

"B starts with butterfly"

So my husband heard this joke on a podcast called Rawrcast (for those who love World of Warcraft beyond playing the game), and he decided to tell it to our 3 1/2 year old. I found her delivery funny - & hope you will, too - so I videotaped her. The subtitle on the punchline is a little hard to read so I've posted it below the video link.

Punchline - Brown Chicken, Brown Cow (sounds like Bow Chicka Wow Wow)

Lately my toddler has given me insight into just how the younger set tracks time and while different than my approach, there still is some logic to it.

The other day she asked me to help her dress her doll and I said "Just give me two seconds" and she promptly replied with "One, two. Now can you help me?"

So I've had to resort to saying "Give me a few minutes" which buys me some time because she doesn't fully grasp the concept. However, she gets it enough to say "That's a lot of minutes."

And today while we were leaving a playdate she wanted to see her friend again. I told her we'd see her friend again next week. She said, "That's a lot of days!"
Yeah, I guess for her, 7 days is a lot of days.